Three years and 1 month without you here with us Josh and still no justice for you. I am trying everything that I can and so are your family, friends and the public. It seems that there are no new leads on the whereabouts of the man the police would like to speak to in connection with your murder, Shane O’Brien (SOB) and there hasn’t been for some time. He has vanished like a puff of smoke, how we don’t know and neither do the police and all of the crime agencies around the worlds who’s job it is to catch him. As impossible as it seems and as frustrated and disappointed that I am that we have no got you justice yet I will not stop, I will not let you down and in your memory I will do all that I can to beat bad with good.
This past month has been full of ups and downs, the down is that we didn’t get what we hoped we would have had, after our appeal on your third year anniversary, the call to say that someone had seen SOB and that he been arrested.
The up’s however have been many, most importantly, Reece gave me photos of you that he had on an old phone, some that I had never seen before and one in particular is of us hugging so tight. He handed them to me at your memorial mass and I was blown away at your beautiful, beautiful face. I would do anything to have you back here home with me Josh your absence is numbing and it renders me speechless.
The past two days in particular have been spent doing things to help continue to keep our case a high profile case as without working 24/7 to find ways to share the wanted poster the case would be pushed further down the list. I have asked for a meeting with the head of the National Crime Agency to find out what their next steps are and while I received a reply from the home office about my concerns and the length of time it is taking to make an arrest they can not comment. I have again accepted requests to talk about knife crime with the press as it only seems to be getter worse with more families and communities being affected by the never ending senseless loss of life, their pain is our pain because with every new fatality we are right back at the RE Bar waiting for your body to come out and the journey since then.
As well as digging deep to continue our fight I have been sharing your story with young children and youths and I have tried to help make life a little bit nicer even for a day for others who have lost their loved one through knife crime. I nominated my friend Jessica Plummer’s Son Andre and your cousins Reece Rozay and Oliver Kennedy for a Jack Petchey achievement award which they all recieved and the past two days I had the absolute privilege to present them with them and attend their chosen activity with the £250.00 award money that they each received.
Yesterday I went to see Andre and his friends who had chosen to go Go Karting and today I went along to share a day with Reece and Oliver and their friends along with my family at GoApe. Being around groups of young men is a constant reminder that you are not here Josh as I see you and hear your laugh and it breaks my heart but I know that you are saying carry on Mum you are doing a great job and I love you for it.
God I love you so much it truly hurts and this pain, this ache and relentless throbbing in my heart has again sent me off balance so I have taken the last few hours to sit and reflect while crying for you and all that you went through 37 months ago. You are my baby today, tomorrow and forever and I want you to know that I know that you are always near me.